I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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