somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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