Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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