Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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