Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
