I just threw up on my dentist
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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