She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
