It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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