Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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