I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize