Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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