i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize