Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Holy sore nipples Batman
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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