I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize