ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
