Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
