yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
