Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize