She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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