apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
