I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize
