No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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