Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
