It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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