I look better un-naked...
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
