Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
