So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
