apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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