If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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