seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
