i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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