can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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