u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
We need to get me chipped asap
Randomize
