how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
