You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
