Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Randomize