I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
