There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
