some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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