he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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