So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
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