Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
