im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
