I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.