that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
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the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize