You're so nebulous sometimes
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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