You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
