its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
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i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
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230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
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