I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
