yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Randomize
