i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
